{"id":6026,"date":"2019-10-05T22:06:32","date_gmt":"2019-10-05T22:06:32","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/blog\/2019\/10\/05\/overcoming-the-fears-of-divorce\/"},"modified":"2019-10-05T22:06:32","modified_gmt":"2019-10-05T22:06:32","slug":"overcoming-the-fears-of-divorce","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/blog\/overcoming-the-fears-of-divorce\/","title":{"rendered":"Overcoming The Fears Of Divorce"},"content":{"rendered":"<div style=\"margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px;\" class=\"sharethis-inline-share-buttons\" ><\/div><p><body>&#13;<\/p>\n<div align=\"center\">&#13;<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\">&#13;<br \/>\n  <img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" border=\"0\" src=\"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/12\/abbtop.jpg\" width=\"800\" height=\"120\"\/><\/a><br \/><a href=\"http:\/\/www.website.ws\/kvmlm2\/my.dhtml?sponsor=geekzonehostingcom&amp;bannercode=gif002&amp;language=english\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/images.website.ws\/images\/english\/banners\/kvmlm2\/468x60_02.gif\" border=\"0\"\/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>&#13;<\/p>\n<table width=\"800\" border=\"0\" cellspacing=\"0\" cellpadding=\"5\">\n<tr>\n<td colspan=\"2\">&#13;<br \/>\n\t  &#13;<\/p>\n<div align=\"center\">&#13;<br \/>\n\t     <script type=\"text\/javascript\"><![CDATA[<!--\ngoogle_ad_client = \"pub-5712520513640847\";\ngoogle_ad_width = 728;\ngoogle_ad_height = 90;\ngoogle_ad_format = \"728x90_as\";\ngoogle_ad_type = \"text_image\";\ngoogle_ad_channel =\"\";\ngoogle_color_border = \"336699\";\ngoogle_color_bg = \"FFFFFF\";\ngoogle_color_link = \"0000FF\";\ngoogle_color_url = \"008000\";\ngoogle_color_text = \"000000\";\n\/\/-->]]><\/script><script type=\"text\/javascript\" src=\"http:\/\/pagead2.googlesyndication.com\/pagead\/show_ads.js\"><![CDATA[\n         ]]><\/script>   &#13;<br \/>\n\t  \u00a0<\/div>\n<\/td>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\n    <\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td width=\"260\" valign=\"top\">\n<p>\u00a0&#13;<br \/>\n\t  &#13;<br \/>\n\t  &#13;\n\t  <\/p>\n<div align=\"left\"><span class=\"style23\">&#13;<\/p>\n<p align=\"left\" class=\"style23\">Article Navigation <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\n        <a href=\"index.html\"><font size=\"3\">Back To &#13;<br \/>\n          Main Page <\/font> <\/a> &#13;<\/p>\n<p\/><\/span><\/div>\n<p>&#13;<\/p>\n<p align=\"left\"\/>\n<hr\/>\n<p align=\"left\"><script type=\"text\/javascript\"><![CDATA[<!--\ngoogle_ad_client = \"pub-5712520513640847\";\ngoogle_ad_width = 250;\ngoogle_ad_height = 250;\ngoogle_ad_format = \"250x250_as\";\ngoogle_ad_type = \"text\";\ngoogle_ad_channel =\"\";\ngoogle_color_border = \"FFFFFF\";\ngoogle_color_bg = \"FFFFFF\";\ngoogle_color_link = \"0000FF\";\ngoogle_color_url = \"008000\";\ngoogle_color_text = \"000000\";\n\/\/-->]]><\/script><script type=\"text\/javascript\" src=\"http:\/\/pagead2.googlesyndication.com\/pagead\/show_ads.js\"><![CDATA[\n            ]]><\/script><\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\n            \u00a0<\/p>\n<p align=\"left\"><b><a href=\"index.html\"><font size=\"4\">&#13;<br \/>\n      <span style=\"background-color: #FF6600\">Click Here<\/span><\/font><\/a><\/b><font size=\"4\"><span style=\"background-color: #FF6600\"> &#13;<br \/>\n      for more articles<\/span><\/font><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<p>&#13;<\/p>\n<td width=\"514\" valign=\"top\">\n<div align=\"left\">&#13;<\/p>\n<table width=\"99%\" height=\"114\">\n<tr>\n<td height=\"45\"><span class=\"style7\"><!-- Search Google -->&#13;<br \/>\n<center>&#13;<\/p>\n<form method=\"get\" action=\"http:\/\/www.google.com\/custom\" target=\"_top\">&#13;<\/p>\n<table bgcolor=\"#ffffff\">\n<tr>\n<td nowrap=\"nowrap\" valign=\"top\" align=\"left\" height=\"32\">&#13;<br \/>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/www.google.com\/\">&#13;<br \/>\n<img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.google.com\/logos\/Logo_25wht.gif\" border=\"0\" alt=\"Google\" align=\"middle\" width=\"75\" height=\"32\"\/><\/a>&#13;<br \/>\n<input type=\"text\" name=\"q\" size=\"31\" maxlength=\"255\" value=\"\"\/><input type=\"submit\" name=\"sa\" value=\"Search\"\/><input type=\"hidden\" name=\"client\" value=\"pub-5712520513640847\"\/><input type=\"hidden\" name=\"forid\" value=\"1\"\/><input type=\"hidden\" name=\"ie\" value=\"ISO-8859-1\"\/><input type=\"hidden\" name=\"oe\" value=\"ISO-8859-1\"\/><input type=\"hidden\" name=\"cof\" value=\"GALT:#008000;GL:1;DIV:#336699;VLC:663399;AH:center;BGC:FFFFFF;LBGC:336699;ALC:0000FF;LC:0000FF;T:000000;GFNT:0000FF;GIMP:0000FF;FORID:1;\"\/><input type=\"hidden\" name=\"hl\" value=\"en\"\/><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/table>\n<\/form>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\n<\/center>&#13;<br \/>\n<!-- Search Google -->&#13;<br \/>\n<\/span><\/td>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\n            <\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td align=\"left\" height=\"22\">\n<div align=\"justify\"><span class=\"style7\">&#13;<br \/>\n                <font color=\"#FB7014\" size=\"4\" face=\"Tahoma\">Overcoming the Fears of Divorce<\/font><\/span><\/div>\n<\/td>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\n            <\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td align=\"left\" height=\"19\">\n<div align=\"justify\"><span class=\"style2\">by: &#13;<br \/>\n                <font size=\"3\" face=\"Times New Roman\" color=\"#FB7014\">Harlan Jacobsen<\/font><\/span><\/div>\n<\/td>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\n            <\/tr>\n<tr>\n<div id=\"article\">\n<td align=\"left\" height=\"12\"><span class=\"style2\">The new fears surfacing during and as a result of your divorce process become a heavy wave of fear and add much more despair to an already overloaded period in your life. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nFear is a major factor in the stress and moving on from your divorce. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nFear of the unknown. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nProbably more &#8220;unknowns&#8221; hanging over your head, than any other time in your life. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nWhat catastrophe happens to me next? <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nYou will need to learn how to handle these fears that seem to come along with the divorce process.. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nIf you do not learn how to confront and control these fears of divorce, you risk losing your emotional and physical health and the joy of living. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nFear has been with you forever, and has all along the way touched every aspect of your life. <br \/>&#13;<br \/>\nHere are some examples of fears to help jog your memory&#8230;failure, the future, financial insecurity, rejection, injury, success, height, water, fire, flying, germs, relationships or lack of, death, sex, or lack of, war, losing something, not getting something, getting caught for wrongdoings, crowds, public speaking, relapsing, being wrong, the opposite sex, the same sex, the unknown, health problems, any phobias , etc. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nThis heightened state of fear during the divorce process, may derive from a self-centered fear that as a result of our divorce that we will lose something that we already have or not ever again be able to get something that we want or need. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nGet these fears out in the open by submitting them to paper and take a good look at them. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nWrite down each fear that you have experienced as a result of and a part of the divorce process experience. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nDoing this exercise on paper is an important part of the step to move on that we are explaining here.<br \/>&#13;<br \/>\nTo cheat and not do the &#8220;on paper&#8221; exercise is to cheat no one but yourself and your moving on to a new life.<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nUse descriptive words to cover both the feelings and beliefs underlying your newly acquired divorce fears. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nYou will then be able to talk more honestly and openly about your fears with someone who cares, whether it is a professional or a friend. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nYour divorce induced fears are one of the parts of your divorce that need to be and can be talked out. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nWriting it down and seeing them in black and white will help you focus your thoughts as you face your fears. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nOnce you have your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs all written out in front of you, this will allow you to be more objective with what is going on with your fears. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nThese fears restricting us from doing what should be done, or causing us to do what should be avoided, can set in motion chains of circumstances which can add significantly to divorce woes. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nThese predictable fears can add additional misfortunes that we do not need or deserve. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nIs it possible that you have developed some of these new fears because you have relied on yourself and you now see yourself as having failed ? <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nIs this apparent lack of power and feeling your life has gotten out of control, affect your circumstances and your present dilemma? <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nIn the divorce process, particularly if in a legal adversarial battle with two attorneys. life seems much of the time to have almost completely gotten out of your control. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nFear of all the bad outcome possibilities and then not knowing what will happen next is bad enough. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nIt is devastating to discover that it now appears, no matter what you do or how much effort you expend, you will have no control whatsoever of the out come. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nFinancial insecurity, is perhaps the biggest fear and stress of divorce. Perhaps the money was not enough to go around when you were both supporting one household. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nNow, with divorce, that same income is now going to have to be stretched to support two households. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nCertainly someone&#8217;s standard of living is going to have to be drastically lowered and likely both. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nHow bad is it going to be, how can you survive? <br \/>&#13;<br \/>\nAre you going to lose your home? <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nFear piles in of what all you might lose. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nNext most common fear is rejection, I was rejected by my spouse who knew me better then anyone in the world. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nResult, now my fear is that no one will ever love me again&#8230;&#8230;&#8230;. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nAfraid of never getting involved in a relationship again, or lack of ever having sex again, fear of not ever finding companionship again, fear of being wrong, fear of the opposite sex, fear of the unknown, what lies ahead. etc etc <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nFears not only cause stress, they can eat away at your body, mind and emotions. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nYour spirit gets lost in the waves of emotions: anger, frustration and the loss of all joy and hope. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nThe new fears surfacing as your divorce progresses, bring on a new wave of despair.<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nFear of the unknown or what catastrophe happens next is the great problem with the divorce process. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nIf is perfectly normal to be uncomfortable with anything new or unknown, and becomes a fear when the unknown can include losses. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nTo overcome these fears, simply become informed and knowledgeable about all things in your divorce, that lie ahead. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nWhen you know all about it, it no longer is a fear. Read up on and become informed, on this web site and associated links.. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nWe have spent years putting together what you need to know to survive divorce and to move on to a second chance to get on with a great new life. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nYou need not be afraid of and\/or powerless, when it comes to what you know how to handle. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nYou have no experience and little or no knowledge about what you are going thru. It is natural to have fears about what you know nothing about. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nOthers have gone thru it and left you the information you need to know, so go thru this process, totally informed and knowledgeable. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nIf you remain ignorant about it and afraid, it is in a large part because you simply have not done your home work.  <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nIt is very important to learn how to handle your fears, get them under your control, to get thru your divorce recovery process. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nThe uncertainty of your new roles, all on your own, perhaps feeling for the first time in your life, not having someone around as a baby sitter.<br \/>&#13;<br \/>\nFor the first time the almost complete isolation you face and the lack of the unknown, together all stress you out far more than when you had been going through your daily life before divorce. . <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nWith the onset of the split, often fears started to run wild. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nYou will eventually come to realize you do not have control over events or other people. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nHowever, you do have total control over your response to events and to people.. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nThis is where we begin to wage our battle with fear <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nYes, the only control you have is over yourself. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nPerhaps for the first time you are now totally in charge and control of your own life. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nYou alone have all responsibility for you. That is indeed scary. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nCan you handle it? <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nIt is now your choice on how you will choose to live it. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nChoose now how you will obtain the necessary tools, knowledge and assistance to live your life with more happiness, more joy and more love then you have ever experienced before. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nYou must do something about these needless fears immediately if you find yourself being overwhelmed and experiencing fear. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nConsider fear as the enemy. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nVisualize your mind as a house. When you leave the doors and windows open, these fears rush in and take over. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nClose your mental windows and doors and lock them out, and they will soon go away. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nWhatever you fear most has no power &#8211; it is your fear that has the power.<br \/>&#13;<br \/>\nOprah Winfrey <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nHere are some additional suggestions:<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nMost of your fears are mere shadows. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nDo whatever you need to cover and do to take normal precautions from what you fear. in a relaxed and healthy manner.. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nSay to yourself, &#8221; My new life is not controlled by fear&#8221;. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nFear is like a bully that tries to intimidate you, the more it affects you, the more it comes on to you. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nWhen and if the bully finds out you lock it out and ignore it, the fear bully finding it has no power over you, soon leaves. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nRemind yourself of the following, several times throughout the day. and every time your fears rise to the top of consciousness. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\n&#8220;My fears are mere shadows, and most of these fears I have imagined are not about to become my reality. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nThe 5% that do are never as bad as I had envisioned them.&#8221; <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nTake time to see yourself living your life in complete control and more fully and happily then you ever have before. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nWhat you visualize all day long you will bring about. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nWhere you put the power of your attention is what manifests it self so do not dwell on or allow your fears in, <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nStop bringing up and processing of your fears. as a result, soon, they fade away and are &#8220;out of here&#8221;.<\/p>\n<p><b\/><\/p>\n<p><\/span><\/td>\n<\/div>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"article_bio\">Article by Harlan Jacobsen. Harlan has been writing numerous articles and series on successful single life for 32 years that appear on the Internet and singles newspapers. For more articles on single life by Harlan, subscribe to some of his many free singles newsletters here: and visit his <a href=\"http:\/\/DatingAgain101.com\">http:\/\/DatingAgain101.com<\/a> and <a href=\"http:\/\/DivorceRecovery101.com\">http:\/\/DivorceRecovery101.com<\/a><\/td>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\n            <\/tr>\n<\/table>\n<\/div>\n<p align=\"left\">\u00a0        <\/p>\n<p>&#13;\n      <\/td>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\n    <\/tr>\n<\/table>\n<hr width=\"800\" noshade=\"noshade\"\/><a href=\"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/ADSENSEWEBSITES\">RETURN TO ADSENSE BUSINESS-IN-A-BOX MASTER ARTICLE INDEX<\/a><\/p>\n<hr width=\"800\" noshade=\"noshade\"\/>\n<div class=\"fb-share-button\" data-href=\"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/\" data-layout=\"button\" data-size=\"large\"><a target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/sharer\/sharer.php?u=https%3A%2F%2Fon-line-interactivity.com%2F&amp;src=sdkpreparse\" class=\"fb-xfbml-parse-ignore\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Share<\/a><\/div>\n<p>&#13;<\/p>\n<div id=\"fb-root\"\/>&#13;<br \/>\n<script async=\"\" defer=\"defer\" crossorigin=\"anonymous\" src=\"https:\/\/connect.facebook.net\/en_US\/sdk.js#xfbml=1&amp;version=v4.0&amp;appId=103650273035821&amp;autoLogAppEvents=1\"\/><!-- End of FACEBOOK SHARE BUTTON CODE --><span class=\"style6\"><br \/><span class=\"style2\">\u00a92019 - All Rights Reserved by <a href=\"http:\/\/HelpMeFindFreedom.Online\">HelpMeFindFreedom.Online<\/a><br \/><a href=\"http:\/\/www.website.ws\/kvmlm2\/my.dhtml?sponsor=geekzonehostingcom&amp;bannercode=gif002&amp;language=english\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/images.website.ws\/images\/english\/banners\/kvmlm2\/468x60_02.gif\" border=\"0\"\/><\/a><\/span><\/span><\/div>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\n<\/body><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; \u00a0 &#13; \u00a0&#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; Article Navigation &#13; Back To &#13; Main Page &#13; &#13; &#13; \u00a0 &#13; Click Here &#13; for more articles &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; Overcoming the Fears of Divorce &#13; by: &#13; Harlan [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6026","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-adsense-business-in-a-box"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6026","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6026"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6026\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6026"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6026"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6026"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}