{"id":6047,"date":"2019-10-05T22:06:31","date_gmt":"2019-10-05T22:06:31","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/blog\/2019\/10\/05\/weaving-the-brokenness-healing-the-wound-of-m\/"},"modified":"2019-10-05T22:06:31","modified_gmt":"2019-10-05T22:06:31","slug":"weaving-the-brokenness-healing-the-wound-of-m","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/blog\/weaving-the-brokenness-healing-the-wound-of-m\/","title":{"rendered":"Weaving The Brokenness   Healing The Wound Of M"},"content":{"rendered":"<div style=\"margin-top: 0px; margin-bottom: 0px;\" class=\"sharethis-inline-share-buttons\" ><\/div><p><body>&#13;<\/p>\n<div align=\"center\">&#13;<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\">&#13;<br \/>\n  <img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" border=\"0\" src=\"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/12\/abbtop.jpg\" width=\"800\" height=\"120\"\/><\/a><br \/><a href=\"http:\/\/www.website.ws\/kvmlm2\/my.dhtml?sponsor=geekzonehostingcom&amp;bannercode=gif002&amp;language=english\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/images.website.ws\/images\/english\/banners\/kvmlm2\/468x60_02.gif\" border=\"0\"\/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>&#13;<\/p>\n<table width=\"800\" border=\"0\" cellspacing=\"0\" cellpadding=\"5\">\n<tr>\n<td colspan=\"2\">&#13;<br \/>\n\t  &#13;<\/p>\n<div align=\"center\">&#13;<br \/>\n\t     <script type=\"text\/javascript\"><![CDATA[<!--\ngoogle_ad_client = \"change-adsense\";\ngoogle_ad_width = 728;\ngoogle_ad_height = 90;\ngoogle_ad_format = \"728x90_as\";\ngoogle_ad_type = \"text_image\";\ngoogle_ad_channel =\"\";\ngoogle_color_border = \"336699\";\ngoogle_color_bg = \"FFFFFF\";\ngoogle_color_link = \"0000FF\";\ngoogle_color_url = \"008000\";\ngoogle_color_text = \"000000\";\n\/\/-->]]><\/script><script type=\"text\/javascript\" src=\"http:\/\/pagead2.googlesyndication.com\/pagead\/show_ads.js\"><![CDATA[\n         ]]><\/script>   &#13;<br \/>\n\t  \u00a0<\/div>\n<\/td>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\n    <\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td width=\"260\" valign=\"top\">\n<p>\u00a0&#13;<br \/>\n\t  &#13;<br \/>\n\t  &#13;\n\t  <\/p>\n<div align=\"left\"><span class=\"style23\">&#13;<\/p>\n<p align=\"left\" class=\"style23\">Article Navigation <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\n        <a href=\"index.html\"><font size=\"3\">Back To &#13;<br \/>\n          Main Page <\/font> <\/a> &#13;<\/p>\n<p\/><\/span><\/div>\n<p>&#13;<\/p>\n<p align=\"left\"\/>\n<hr\/>\n<p align=\"left\"><script type=\"text\/javascript\"><![CDATA[<!--\ngoogle_ad_client = \"change-adsense\";\ngoogle_ad_width = 250;\ngoogle_ad_height = 250;\ngoogle_ad_format = \"250x250_as\";\ngoogle_ad_type = \"text\";\ngoogle_ad_channel =\"\";\ngoogle_color_border = \"FFFFFF\";\ngoogle_color_bg = \"FFFFFF\";\ngoogle_color_link = \"0000FF\";\ngoogle_color_url = \"008000\";\ngoogle_color_text = \"000000\";\n\/\/-->]]><\/script><script type=\"text\/javascript\" src=\"http:\/\/pagead2.googlesyndication.com\/pagead\/show_ads.js\"><![CDATA[\n            ]]><\/script><\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\n            \u00a0<\/p>\n<p align=\"left\"><b><a href=\"index.html\"><font size=\"4\">&#13;<br \/>\n      <span style=\"background-color: #FF6600\">Click Here<\/span><\/font><\/a><\/b><font size=\"4\"><span style=\"background-color: #FF6600\"> &#13;<br \/>\n      for more articles<\/span><\/font><\/p>\n<\/td>\n<p>&#13;<\/p>\n<td width=\"514\" valign=\"top\">\n<div align=\"left\">&#13;<\/p>\n<table width=\"99%\" height=\"114\">\n<tr>\n<td height=\"45\"><span class=\"style7\"><!-- Search Google -->&#13;<br \/>\n<center>&#13;<\/p>\n<form method=\"get\" action=\"http:\/\/www.google.com\/custom\" target=\"_top\">&#13;<\/p>\n<table bgcolor=\"#ffffff\">\n<tr>\n<td nowrap=\"nowrap\" valign=\"top\" align=\"left\" height=\"32\">&#13;<br \/>\n<a href=\"http:\/\/www.google.com\/\">&#13;<br \/>\n<img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.google.com\/logos\/Logo_25wht.gif\" border=\"0\" alt=\"Google\" align=\"middle\" width=\"75\" height=\"32\"\/><\/a>&#13;<br \/>\n<input type=\"text\" name=\"q\" size=\"31\" maxlength=\"255\" value=\"\"\/><input type=\"submit\" name=\"sa\" value=\"Search\"\/><input type=\"hidden\" name=\"client\" value=\"change-adsense\"\/><input type=\"hidden\" name=\"forid\" value=\"1\"\/><input type=\"hidden\" name=\"ie\" value=\"ISO-8859-1\"\/><input type=\"hidden\" name=\"oe\" value=\"ISO-8859-1\"\/><input type=\"hidden\" name=\"cof\" value=\"GALT:#008000;GL:1;DIV:#336699;VLC:663399;AH:center;BGC:FFFFFF;LBGC:336699;ALC:0000FF;LC:0000FF;T:000000;GFNT:0000FF;GIMP:0000FF;FORID:1;\"\/><input type=\"hidden\" name=\"hl\" value=\"en\"\/><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/table>\n<\/form>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\n<\/center>&#13;<br \/>\n<!-- Search Google -->&#13;<br \/>\n<\/span><\/td>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\n            <\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td align=\"left\" height=\"22\">\n<div align=\"justify\"><span class=\"style7\">&#13;<br \/>\n                <font color=\"#FB7014\" size=\"4\" face=\"Tahoma\">Weaving the Brokenness &#8211; Healing the Wound of Mother Abandonment<\/font><\/span><\/div>\n<\/td>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\n            <\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td align=\"left\" height=\"19\">\n<div align=\"justify\"><span class=\"style2\">by: &#13;<br \/>\n                <font size=\"3\" face=\"Times New Roman\" color=\"#FB7014\">Paula Krapf<\/font><\/span><\/div>\n<\/td>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\n            <\/tr>\n<tr>\n<div id=\"article\">\n<td align=\"left\" height=\"12\"><span class=\"style2\">My daughter puts her arms around me, her brown eyes soft and beckoning. Her rounded belly and motherly curves rest against me, and for a moment I choke up. She is pregnant with a girl baby whose middle name will be Joy like mine. She will be my first grand-daughter, and my second grandchild. <\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nI was named Joy by my great-grandmother, Blanche, the mother of my grandmother Lulu, who spent much of her childhood living with Blanche\u0092s mother. When Lulu was a young woman, she abandoned her daughter Josephine. Josephine abandoned me when I was four years old, leaving me with her mother. What a heritage!<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nWhen I look at my daughter, I see the images of my foremothers in my mind\u0097my beautiful but insensitive mother, my intelligent, breaking-the-rules grandmother. I remember their terrible fights and broken dishes that went flying when my mother came to visit, and I think of my grandmother\u0092s deathbed, where there was no forgiveness between them. I think of how my mother didn\u0092t want anyone to know she had a child, and how I tried to win her love until she died.<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nI was able to break the chains of abandonment, but I still carry within me the memories of these passionate but disturbed women whose genes I carry. I am the last remaining witness to know and remember this heritage. We are the first mother-daughter generation to hug, kiss, talk over our disagreements, apologize, forgive, and have a loving relationship. For this I give thanks every day.<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nMy grandmother and mother didn\u0092t want grandchildren either. My children were not welcomed, and my mother made it clear the few times she saw my children, they were to keep their identity a secret too. Her passing on the poison to my children woke me up to how cruel and heartless she was. Over the years, I had adjusted to her rejection of me, but when I saw her teach my children not to call her grandmother, and to lie to the people at her apartment about their identity, I snapped. I never tried to get her to accept us again after that. I had to accept that she never would.<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nThis was another pattern. When my grandmother received the telegram announcing my birth, she threw it aside saying, \u0093So the brat is born.\u0094 Later, she took me in and raised me, but the feeling that I was living on the edge of societal and familial acceptance settled deep into my bones.<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nMy story is only one such story about this topic\u0097mother-child abandonment. There are many thousands of such stories in the world, people who were abandoned as children. On my book tour for Don\u0092t Call Me Mother\u0097Breaking the Chain of Mother-Daughter Abandonment, people listen with tears in their eyes as I read about the loss and loneliness that I felt as a child, and they cheer me on as I read how I fought to find myself and create a better life. When they come to me afterward to tell me how I have told a part of their story, I understand the tears are for their own childhood losses that are being healed by hearing another\u0092s story. It is gratifying to see that I can use the painful parts of my life to give others hope about creating lives of meaning and joy despite deep early wounds.<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nIf you recognize your story in mine, here are a few healing suggestions<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nHealing Abandonment<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\n1.      Remind yourself of these things:<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\na.       It was not your fault<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nb.      You were not a bad child<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nc.       Your mother may not have realized how deeply this affected you<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nd.      You deserve love<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\n2.      Create joy and beauty in your life now.<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\na.       Gather supportive friends and loved ones around you<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nb.      Feed yourself good food, and treat your body well<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nc.       Give yourself birthday parties and moments of celebration<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nd.      Create your own family, whether it is your own children or friends whom you adopt as your new family<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\ne.       Appreciate each day as it unfolds<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\n3.      Find the help you need to heal your wounds<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\na.       Find a therapist who believes that the past affects the present and can help you work through it<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nb.      Write your story\u0097from your point of view all the way through<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nc.       Illustrate your story with family photos<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nd.      After you write your story, write the story of your mother\u0092s life. Research her life as best you can. Illustrate it with photos.<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\n4.      Use visualization, meditation, and prayer to get in touch with the life you want to live, and the blessings of your life<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\na.       Meditate in quiet surroundings each day for at least 10 minutes<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nb.      Read books that inspire you to love and accept yourself<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nc.       Share with others your healing story<\/p>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\nLinda Joy Myers, Ph. D., prize winning author of Becoming Whole: Writing Your Healing Story,  is a Marriage and Family therapist and teaches memoir-as-healing workshops in the San Francisco Bay Area and nationally. Linda\u0092s work has been praised by reviewers, healers, and radio and television interviewers.<br \/>&#13;<br \/>\nYou can visit her web site at: http:\/\/www.lindajoymyers.com<\/p>\n<p><b>This article is free for republishing<\/b><\/p>\n<p><\/span><\/td>\n<\/div>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td class=\"article_bio\"\/>&#13;<br \/>\n            <\/tr>\n<\/table>\n<\/div>\n<p align=\"left\">\u00a0        <\/p>\n<p>&#13;\n      <\/td>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\n    <\/tr>\n<\/table>\n<hr width=\"800\" noshade=\"noshade\"\/><a href=\"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/ADSENSEWEBSITES\">RETURN TO ADSENSE BUSINESS-IN-A-BOX MASTER ARTICLE INDEX<\/a><\/p>\n<hr width=\"800\" noshade=\"noshade\"\/>\n<div class=\"fb-share-button\" data-href=\"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/\" data-layout=\"button\" data-size=\"large\"><a target=\"_blank\" href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/sharer\/sharer.php?u=https%3A%2F%2Fon-line-interactivity.com%2F&amp;src=sdkpreparse\" class=\"fb-xfbml-parse-ignore\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Share<\/a><\/div>\n<p>&#13;<\/p>\n<div id=\"fb-root\"\/>&#13;<br \/>\n<script async=\"\" defer=\"defer\" crossorigin=\"anonymous\" src=\"https:\/\/connect.facebook.net\/en_US\/sdk.js#xfbml=1&amp;version=v4.0&amp;appId=103650273035821&amp;autoLogAppEvents=1\"\/><!-- End of FACEBOOK SHARE BUTTON CODE --><span class=\"style6\"><br \/><span class=\"style2\">\u00a92019 - All Rights Reserved by <a href=\"http:\/\/HelpMeFindFreedom.Online\">HelpMeFindFreedom.Online<\/a><br \/><a href=\"http:\/\/www.website.ws\/kvmlm2\/my.dhtml?sponsor=geekzonehostingcom&amp;bannercode=gif002&amp;language=english\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/images.website.ws\/images\/english\/banners\/kvmlm2\/468x60_02.gif\" border=\"0\"\/><\/a><\/span><\/span><\/div>\n<p>&#13;<br \/>\n<\/body><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; \u00a0 &#13; \u00a0&#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; Article Navigation &#13; Back To &#13; Main Page &#13; &#13; &#13; \u00a0 &#13; Click Here &#13; for more articles &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; &#13; Weaving the Brokenness &#8211; Healing the Wound of Mother [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6047","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-adsense-business-in-a-box"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6047","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6047"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6047\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6047"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6047"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/on-line-interactivity.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6047"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}